Take Time To Step Out of Your Comfort Zone...Before You Have To

... being a successful person is not necessarily defined by what you have achieved, but by what you have overcome. - Fannie Flagg

What If You Found Out You Were Adopted?

I’m currently listening to Fannie Flagg’s book The All-Girl Filling Station’s Last Reunion: A Novel.  Fannie Flagg is the author of Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe - I saw the movie but never read the book...Now I might.  

The book is about a 59-year-old, married, Southern woman with a domineering Southern belle mother who discovers she was adopted, and how she comes to terms with this fact, while we relive her birth mother’s life.  It is funny, heartfelt, and Fannie does a fabulous job reading the audiobook.  I can’t spoil the ending because I don’t know what it is yet!

Listening to the questions, the main character, Sookie Poole, asks about her life, made me think about how we get stuck in our comfort zone and forget there are other lives we could be living.

For example, Sookie’s birth mother was Polish, and she wonders if she would like Polish food, never having tasted it.  Then she thinks about all the times her mother expressed her disappointment when she didn’t hold up the family standard.  Did I mention her mother is a bit delusional?  Sookie begins to question these accusations and the impact they had on her self-esteem, especially since she wasn’t of the “bloodline” anyway.

So where am I going with this?

What if today you found out you were adopted?  What if your birth mother, family, heritage, was completely different than what you grew up knowing? How might that change your perspective on how you live your life? How would it shake you from your comfort zone?

Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Exploring new sights, sounds, foods, people, and cultures allows me to understand myself better. That’s why I think travel is so important.  When I travel locally or overseas, I experience different ways of life. I grow. I step out of my comfort zone.

You don’t have to travel to get these experiences. You can step out of your comfort zone anytime.  But be warned, when you do it, it will feel uncomfortable for a while. 

When I step out of my comfort zone, I encounter that inner fear, like Sookie, challenging who I think I am.  Am I a writer?  Am I a podcaster?  Am I a gardener?  Before I embark on these journeys, the answer is, “No.” As I explore them, I discover, “Yes, I am.”

Going from “No” to “Yes, I am” creates change and puts you into a bit of chaos as you try to figure things out.  This is normal, my friends, but don’t give up.  I can’t tell you how many interests I explored, but I pushed them aside as soon as I felt uncomfortable.  My podcast is one such project.  I know I want to do this, but for the last year, I’ve pushed it off, with excuses like I’m too busy or I’ll work on that next week.  365 days later, and I’m finally producing my first three episodes, and loving every minute!

What To Do When You Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone

If I can leave you with any words of wisdom, they are:

• Experience something new - Go someplace you’ve never been, attend another culture’s festival, talk with someone with a curiosity about how they grew up, perhaps starting with your family.  You may learn something new.

• Notice your feelings during the experience - Do you feel uncomfortable?  Are you surprised? Do you find yourself smiling for no reason?

• Don’t look for the familiar, instead explore the unfamiliar - It is natural to search for what you know.  We all do that to counter our discomfort.  Instead, lean into the new. Don’t judge.  Just experience.

Settle Or Explore...You Choose Every Day

I believe, myself included, we settle for a daily routine rather than challenge ourselves to grow. I’m not saying you have to be on the go 24/7, but with over 1400 minutes every day, can we maximize the gift we’ve been given just a tad more?

How did things work out for Sookie?  Your guess is as good as mine, but I’ll probably know by the end of the weekend!